Friendship - 2

Well, I also had another rather opposing experience with another friend. I would not write the details of the recent incident out of my respect to that friend. (Let’s use plural, those friends, to refrain ourselves from using gender-revealing third person single pronouns)

Suffice to say that they did something that went against my definition of friendship or relationship, again and again, and again. Yet I still consider them as friends. In fact, I still consider them as my closest friends. But I used to be not without emotions. I used to be offended when these things happened. I used to ’accept’ but still grumbled.

But when that particular unfortunate incident reoccurred this very last week, I felt fine. I was truly okay. They ‘mistreated’ me but I was okay. They can do as they pleased but to me life goes on. I just moved on to the next thing to do.

And I still consider them as friends - more than ever - and wish them well. I still care for them deeply but I am letting go of my expectations on them. They will return when they want to return, when they need to return.

I am letting them be. I am letting me be. I am letting us be. And move on to whatever thing that is in front of me right now. Enjoying what I have. I did not realize how much easier life can be with such attitude.

That night after the incident, I did my prayer. I felt fine. I told God about my experience. I told Him I felt fine and recited a prayer for that friend. I felt God was smiling and nodding at me. I smiled back. It was a beautiful feeling.

I know I still have not graduated from the school of emotion. But thanks for that smile and the nod, God. It makes me feel I am going in the right direction. Hey, even God makes those small gestures to nurture the friendship.

Friendship

Friendship is indeed one of the most valuable experiences I have had this Idul Fitri. I sent out SMS and e-mail to quite a number of people – many of which I have not met or even talked to for some time.

I have many surprising responses from old friends and acquaintances – short but nevertheless sweet. It was a beautiful experience to receive those responses, to get reacquainted once again.

It reminded me a of quote that a friend of mine Philip wrote in his blog as he was remembering a late friend of his whose departure was so soon and sudden.

He said, “As time goes by, I find the reason for my deep grief. Dicky always took time to greet me, here in my weblog or through emails. He dropped me a line or two, posted comments on my blog or sent emails."

Philip then added, "Such a ‘little thing’ I realize now is important in every relationship. Dicky showed me the true meaning of ‘care’. Email, SMS, a buzz on Yahoo messenger, comments on weblog, are meaningful in nurturing friendship.”

He is right. Those small gestures are meaningful in nurturing friendship. Thanks for sharing, pal.

Happy Eid Mubarak 1427H

Abu Hurairah, may Allah be pleased with him, reported:

A person came to Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) and said: Who among the people is most deserving my companionship (of a kind treatment from me?) He said: Your mother. He, again, said: Then who (is the next one)? He said: It is your mother (who deserves the best treatment from you). He said: Then who (is the next one)? He (the Holy Prophet) said: It is your mother. He (again) said: Then who? Thereupon he (The Prophet (peace be upon him)) said: It is your father.

Hadith number in Sahih Muslim [Arabic only]: 4621

Happy Eid Mubarak 1427H

May we all be among those who are able to open our eyes and heart to first and foremost be true to ourselves.

Warmest regards to your mom and dad. Tell them they've done one hell of a good job bringing you up.

Peace in Ramadhan: Animals know better

(why the heck do I put two threads on Ramadhan anyway? Well first, I forgot where I had put the text for this thread. Second, because I want to. Third, because this is my blog and I can do whatever I want with it).

Why do I put pictures of animals for Ramadhan article, you ask. Here is the process. I was flipping through my pictures and promised myself to stop at the first pictures that reminds me of Ramadhan in a split second. When I saw these pictures, I immediately went "aaawwwwhhh", so sweet, so refreshing, so calm. peace. happy.

And that is what I hope Ramadhan may bring to me, to us all: peace and happiness. Within. An internal and internalized process to rejuvenate the soul, to create peace, to search for peace, to do peace. To be peace.

Enjoy a good Ramadhan. A peaceful one. Within.

I can hear my cat Miauw laughing and saying "hah, I told you so. And you thought you were the higher being."

Holy month, humble wishes

It is that time of the lunar year again when all (well, ok, granted, not all) Moslems are fasting. A holy month when hundreds of years ago the Moslems believe the holy book has ‘descended’ to earth through the prophet Muhammad for the first time.

To all who observe the Ramadhan, may we gain much more than just hunger and thirst. In hunger and thirst, we remind ourselves of our brother and sisters who are not as fortunate as we are. In hunger and thirst, we remind ourselves of no reason to be proud. In hunger and thirst, we remind ourselves of God and of being god-like.

To all, I apologize for the wrongs that I might have thought, said or done. I apologize to you and I ask God for His forgiveness.

May we all – all of us, moslems and non-moslems -- be touched by the grandness, peace and love shared in this month. Be aware that God is within each and every one of us. And that ultimately, He is the only way to go, whichever our belief system is.

Return to the true meaning of Islam: a complete surrender to God. In peace. Happy Ramadhan, y'all!!

Showing my color

Proudly wearing my nationality on my sleeve :) The flag of Indonesia. Celebrating the 61st anniversary of its independence. The rest of my comment, see this.

A message from the water

I went to a seminar on the true power of (hexagonal) water. The seminar discussed about the hexagonal water crystal based on the research of Doctor Masaru Emoto and how simple words or wishes can change the structure of water. Hexagonal is supposed to be the most useful or absorbable structure of water for human body. (Do forgive me if I make any technical mistakes).

Emoto-san, which was the main speaker in the seminar, showed all sorts of shapes of water crystals that had been labeled or called by positive and negative names. The word vibrates and affects the water. It changed the water structure one molecule at a time. The water affects whatever is around it. The domino effect does its thing again. All positive words have created beautiful hexagonal crystal that keeps growing. It was amazing.

Whether you believe it or not, it is entirely up to you. But let us say it is true. If small things like labeling or calling something can change the structure of the water, imagine what happens to us and to our body when somebody call us with bad names - bearing in mind that at least 70% of our body consists of water (baby 98%, children 80%). What will happen if we keep on saying bad things - to others and to ourselves? We are destroying our own selves. Vice versa, if we say good things.

To me, the seminar serves at least as a reminder of how even the smallest things can make or break someone – our friends, our family, our partner, our children, ourselves. It was a good reminder.

So I supposed what the Professor was saying was correct. He cleverly titled his presentation “A message from the water”. It was an important message indeed: one that advises us to love others and ourselves through simple means of positive thoughts, words and attitudes. Thank you.

PS: Warmest regards to all my new friends whom I met in the seminar. You do not realize how meeting you has reminded me how ‘green’ I am in the field of seeking oneself, how I have yet so much to learn, and how I am nothing compared to other people. I have nothing to be proud of. I have everything to feel blessed for.