Precious moments

I have just realized something
I cannot remember when was the last time we spoke with each other
I miss that. Precious moments

Those nights
In the early hours
When there were just the two of us and nobody else
Precious moments. I miss that

Those nights
When I told you whatever was on my mind
When you showered me with all the love and wisdom
There were no more secrets. Only simple peace

There were a lot of words and silence
Occasional smiles and tears
Pure love and hurts
How can the twos be put side by side?

It does not seem fair, I know
I do all the taking while you do all the giving
Yet you never seem to mind
You just keep on giving. And loving
Can I ever be like you?
Can I be you? Or is this a statement too bold to make?

Those nights
When I could really feel you beside me
I was about to say 'in me'
but people might misunderstood our relationship

But 'within me' is actually the more correct term
You were closer than my own veins
As you promised in one of your letters
Precious moments. I miss that

I wondered why I felt so restless
Where was the peace that I thought I have found once?
I have my friends and family around me
I am at home. I have all the things that might make people envious
I am lucky, I am fully aware of that. And I am grateful for that
Yet I felt heavy inside – I am confused

I wanted to blame the chaotic environment around me
But I know I could not
If there is somebody to blame, it would be me

Even then you would say there is nobody to blame
It is a process I have to go through
To realize that there is no higher love than yours
To know there is nowhere I would rather be than to be with you
Only by remembering you, that I can feel peace

I know I should not just count on only those nights
I should be able to feel that peace each second of my life
As I know you are there every step of the way
I am not there yet, it is a process I need to go through
For the time being, I will hold on to those nights

But those nights were a long time ago
Those nights when we had our long conversation
In the early hours
Just the two of us

I want to feel that intimacy again
When I can share whatever is on my mind
When you shower me with all the love and wisdom

When there are no more secrets, no more pride
Pure honesty, pure love, and hurts
Precious moments. I miss that.

I have so many things to share with you
Perhaps we should meet. Tonight?